Academy Award

Shadow and movies and light and it's almost 11 pm, do you realize that? I really thought you people were going to bring this in on time... ish. We were doing so well, and then it's like, we have four awards left and suddenly they take ten minutes each or something. Here's a montage of the current best...

Commercial break! (Help! I thought I checked off "don't email comments" each time, but apparently my inbox is on fire anyway!) Here's Jackman again. President of the Academy Sid Ganis is stepping down, and "as a farewell gift, he's promised not to make a speech to us." Okay, I snerked.

Please welcome! Eddie Murphy with the Jean Hersholt humanitarian award! MAN, I am so glad I ran and got an iced tea refill. Jerry Lewis montage opening to "Viva la Vida"! Someone likes them some Coldplay this year. Ah: "From one Nutty Professor to another," I see what you did there. By the way, t...

Best Visual Effects The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (2008): Eric Barba, Steve Preeg, Burt Dalton, Craig Barron The Dark Knight (2008): Nick Davis, Chris Corbould, Timothy Webber, Paul J. Franklin Iron Man (2008): John Nelson, Ben Snow, Daniel Sudick, Shane Mahan

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Ah, looks like we're going for another major award: Best Supporting Actor montage! (Good LORD, Christopher Walken was young). Josh Brolin for Milk (2008/I) Robert Downey Jr. for Tropic Thunder (2008) Philip Seymour Hoffman for Doubt (2008/I) Heath Ledger for The Dark Knight (2008)

Winner: Slumdog Millionaire. "Thank you, Ben, Natalie," Anthony Dod Mantle says. "That was very... inspiring." You know, we can kiss the nominated actors' asses for ten minutes straight but technical awards are treated like massive jokes. I mean, go with Epic Seriosity or Doing It For the Lulz...

WHY HELLO THERE, Daniel Craig. And Sarah Jessica Parker. We have a junky-looking set with intended to represent art direction, I guess--curtains and chandeliers chucked here and there. Smooth jazz noodles in the background to go with that whole "nightclub" aesthetic they wanted. It may be...

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Please welcome! Jennifer Aniston and Jack Black! Jack Black is giving the camera crazy eyes. Jennifer Aniston mentions that animation is making them all obsolete, and Jack Black says that he actually makes more money doing voices--he does one Dreamworks movie a year, and then he takes al...

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Wow, I don't know what this bit with dancers in silver and gold bodysuits is about but it seems to be for The Reader, which is... probably one of the least appropriate things ever. Awesome. And here's a makeshift Wrestler set and it's going so fast and now he's done and getting a standing ovation. An...

Please enjoy my icon's brand-new Oscar gown from Yahoo Avatars.) Sarah Jessica Parker, belted Dior ballgown in kind of an off white, long loose wavy hair. Viola Davis in a gold halter dress, diamond brooch--kind of a burnished gold, not a scary Vegas lamé gold. Very nice.

Oscar show secrets! The stage is gonna look like a nightclub! The awards will be presented "as a narrative" [wha?]! "And at least some of the presenters who'd been lined up have backed out, emboldened by the anonymity they were afforded by the producers." O SNAP.)

So I have to apologize in advance for upcoming spamminess, because the Screen Actors Guild awards are on tonight (TBS?), and I'll be liveblogging them as well. (Traditionally I only liveblog three awards shows, so the Oscars late next month are the only other show you have to worry about. An...

Did I mention that I just realized yesterday that the Golden Globes are this weekend? I mean, not that that's a huge problem, but I hadn't started strength-training mentally preparing myself for the liveblogging. (The goal, by the way, is to have something you can actually read a week late...