Bai Ling

By Michael K Let's press the green button on the "Totally Random Couple" generator and see who comes out! Well, what do you know? We have Bai Ling and Lionel Richie! Pop Tarts says that 42-year-old (in alien years) Bai and 60-year-old Lionel had themselves a romantic date at the Viceroy in Santa Monica...

By Michael K I also would love this union because I need to see Bai walk the red carpet at the Oscars. Everyone was so damn normal at the Golden Globes and the wrecks in chiffon must return! The mess of all messes Sally Kirkland has been M.I.A. on red carpets for a while, so Bai Ling needs to take her place.

By Michael K At the opening of "Third Eye Blonde" in Malibu last week, Bai gave her thoughts on who should be president. She said she really wasn't familiar with the candidates, but the president needs to have "bigger heart and kindler soul and quietly have the only pure intentions." This is why I adore Ba...

By Michael K No, Bai Ling's boyfriend is not giving her a little knuckle lovin' right there on the beach. Bai Ling is making death face! We almost lost our beloved Bai Ling when a wave knocked her out. Okay, she didn't almost die. She just got a little water in the brains. A little water in there will do Bai some g...

By Michael K Why doesn't Bai Ling top the all the best dressed in Hollywood lists? Would you ever see Nicole Kidman or Halle Berry in this outfit? They don't have the hard nipples to pull off this kind of custom couture. Ok, it was made in the basement of a take-out joint in Encino, but still! This is the kind...

By Michael K TMZ reports that Bai Ling was arrested at LAX yesterday for allegedly trying to steal two tabloid magazines and a pack of batteries. The batteries were probably for her dildo. Bai walked into the terminal shop in the afternoon and walked out with the items totaling $16. She was put under citiz...

By Michael K Obviously, Melissa Joan Hart has not seen "Dumplings." It's this horror movie with Bai Ling where she plays a woman who makes dumplings out of fetuses. The dumplings make you look younger. I know it's a movie, but still. I shouldn't say that, Bai is probably extremely gentle with fetuses. She lo...

By Michael K I know Bai Ling dresses Bai Ling, but she needs to fire herself as her own stylist. This outfit looks like the fashion show from "Don't Tell Mom The Babysitter's Dead" and every character in "The Chronicles of Narnia" crashed into each other and exploded all over Bai Ling.

By Michael K In all fairness, this is a great outfit for Bai Ling. She's covering up her thimble-like nipples and for Bai that means a good outfit. It is seriously hideous though. She looks like a slutty Mrs. Roper guest starring on an episode of The Flinstones.    She totally found that fabric on discount or i...

By Michael K I love, love, love Dr. Rey from "Dr. 90210" and apparently so do a bunch of D-list celebrities. Carmen Electra, Jewel and Bai Ling came out to support Dr. Rey's Instant Shape. Instant Shape is basically like Spanx and Dr. Rey is selling that shit at Sears and HSN. High-class! Dr. Rey claims Instant Sh...

By Michael K Bai Ling is crazy! She's a total Angaloonie! Bai has worked with Angelina Jolie on two projects, Sky CRAPtain and the World of Tomorrow and A Place In Time. Bai said that she shares a special energy with Angie.   "I felt this energy between us, when we look at each other there's an energy, an attr...